“Hope smiles from the threshold of the year to come, whispering ‘it will be happier’ ~ Alfred Lord Tennyson
A happier life for me started on January 2nd, 2023. A change of country, scenery, and environment brought with it new vistas and opportunities. It was something that I had dreamt and hoped to do for many years – wintering in a beautiful, warm place.
I had always dreamed of living by the sea and hearing the waves lapping the shore day and night. While I was dreaming, I thought that if there were also mountains, that would be a bonus. Since I saw the Sound of Music and Heidi when I was a little girl, mountains have always beckoned to me. My new locale has the sea, boats, and the Sierra Madre Mountains. Talk about luck!
No snow, ice, freezing rain and freezing cold temperatures for me – for a while anyways! Sundresses and sandals are my usual garb these days. It’s a delight to pick bougainvilleas and ixoras out in the garden along with some tropical greenery. The greatest joy for me is arranging them. Beautiful flowers delight my soul and make me feel happy.
Years ago, a happier life for me was tied to jumping into the sea and having fun swimming in the water. As an older person now, just looking at the sea and the mountains makes my heart sing. It’s a quiet, meditative time that brings me “a happier life.”
During this peaceful, quiet time I’m having here, I’ve begun to think about the pursuit of happiness. Happiness has even been written about in the American Constitution. “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.” ~ Thomas Jefferson, July 4, 1776.
The Constitution gives permission to pursue happiness. I suppose that’s enough reason to pursue it. After all, it seems to be innate for us humans to want to be happy. Yet, just as I was writing this today, a notification came from Shambala Publications about a new book called, “Happiness is Overrated.”
Is happiness overrated? There are many pursuits that people engage in that bring happiness but is this happiness satisfying or long-lasting. Have you every known anyone who was happy all the time, never had any setback along life’s way and just lived in a peaceful, blissful state? I haven’t lived that kind of life and nobody I know or have ever met seems to have had it all together or have had that kind of life. There are people like the Dalai Lama who’ve spent years in meditation that may be the closest to being this way. Despite all his setbacks along the way, he laughs all the time.
I seem to recall that years ago there was a book called “Laughter is the best medicine.” A good laugh really does wonders for body, mind, soul, and spirit. It’s a nice feeling to be able to spontaneously laugh by oneself or with others – at a funny joke, movie, or just while having a great time. A happier life will certainly result.
I had the opportunity to laugh at and with myself spontaneously a week ago. It did me the world of good. The place where I’m staying in Mexico is next to the Marina. The building is in a beautiful setting and hosts fine events like weddings every weekend. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed watching the guests arriving followed by the wedding party, seeing the decorations and beautiful lighting, fresh flowers arriving for the occasion, listening to the music, seeing the fireworks display and all the other aspects of a fine Mexican wedding. This was all from a distance sitting in my condo.
This time I decided to go over and take a closer look at the events and take a few pictures. There was a young, pretty girl, in a flowing pink dress with a flare, surrounded by many people. Others were hovering around on the deck where the ceremony usually takes place. I assumed that she was the bride and was captivated by the splendor of the occasion and the décor.
I thought to myself that maybe in Mexico brides sometimes wear pink. I kind of wondered where the bridegroom was as I didn’t notice any male figure in a tuxedo or anything like that. I didn’t dwell on that for too long as I wanted to check out the area around the pool where I had seen tables set up for dinner in previous weeks. I hurried up the flight of stairs to get there.
It was magical up there. The tables were all beautifully prepared with mostly pink flowers, pink napkins, fine Chinaware, and cutlery. Some gentlemen were hurriedly putting the finishing touches on the area in preparation for the wedding party and guests who would be coming up. There were trees with lights all around and it was a fairyland in my eyes. The workers did not as much as glance at me as they were so busy with their work. I took my photos very quickly and left – happy and satisfied to have had this close-up view of things. I would enjoy the rest of the celebration from my own home as I had done in past weeks.
On Sunday morning, I posted some of the photos I had taken on Facebook saying that the event was next door, the bride wore pink, and the table décor was all pink, and so forth – seems like pink was the bride’s favourite color. After lunch, I was on the computer and checked Facebook. Many people liked the photos and there was a comment from a niece in Florida. She said that what was taking place was called a “quinceanera” – a coming-of-age party for a young girl. It was like the Sweet Sixteen that is sometimes held for girls in other countries. It was a Latin custom, she noted.
Well, I laughed heartily at my faux pas, mistake, lack of cultural awareness, ignorance, or anything else you might care to call it. I laughed inside of myself every time I remembered and laughed loudly throughout the afternoon as well. I thought to myself that it was no wonder that I didn’t see a bridegroom. I laughed again. I also hoped that people who had read my Facebook post would see what my niece had told me and know that I had been completely mistaken. This wasn’t a wedding at all!
I concluded that it wasn’t just the external factors like warmth and sunshine and a meditative time that brought me reason to be happier. It’s all that I’m doing and learning while I’m here as well. A happier life can come in the most unexpected places while we are doing the most unexpected things. A happier life can come with a good belly-laugh at oneself! Expect the unexpected. “Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn, or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.” ~ Denis Waitley
